I am AWESOME.

Miz Bitch is sticking it to the man and moving half way around the world. And since he will be in a position to share make everyone insanely jealous by posting pictures of him riding kangaroos and giving koala’s water and shit, he is contemplating starting a blog that will inevitably kick my blogs ass. I have already resigned myself to this fact. HOWEVER, I have decided that Miz Bitch needs to recognize that his life will not be complete if he leaves before we get a chance to hang out. I am going to be bored out of my mind in September when I go home for my sister’s wedding. And MB will only be about 75 miles away. SO, I have dedicated an entire blog tag just to you, Bitch. My mission is to convince you that your real life friends are less important than me. As we all know, it’s always all about me. Sure, you’re mom will miss you. And your ex-GF will probably give you goodbye sex just for old times sake. But I can make black and white pictures have colored beer! And really, that’s better than risking a lifelong case of herpes any day. I’m going white water rafting in W.Virgina the weekend of September 11. And there are several football games we could get drunk at that month. Vinu lives in Chicago and the three of us could eat a deep dish pizza or watch the Cubs lose. The possibilities are endless. I really think it’s only fair that instead of giving me a ‘maybe’, I get moved to the ‘fuck, yeah!’ column.