Monday, December 05, 2011
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
I think I am a decent person. Sure I occasionally lie and I took some pens from my last job, but who hasn’t done that? And maybe I drink too much and perhaps I’ve been smoking lately but my destructive behaviors really only affect me. I’m sure everyone thinks of themselves as a good person. Even Jeffrey Dahmer probably thought he was somehow doing a good thing by hacking people up and keeping them in his refrigerator. But I put spiders outside instead of killing them. And even though I have been looking for a job all year, when I interviewed for a position that was right up my roommate’s alley, I told them she would be a better fit, which resulted in her getting the job. I volunteer. I try not to be mean, I hang out with people I don’t even really like sometimes because they seem lonely. When I have disposable income I donate money to charity. I hold doors open and I try to be polite.
So why is karma being such a bitch to me this year? Seriously.
It’s been almost a year since I got laid off. I am trying to stay optimistic because I know it could be a lot worse but right now I am substitute teaching for the fall. That is fun. And by fun I mean horrible. Money wise, things are getting semi-scary and subbing really doesn’t pay very well. But at least it’s marginally better than unemployment. And my roommate, the one that landed the job I told her about, just informed me that she is moving about because she ‘needs a cat right now.’ I was hoping to persuade her to stay until January because it’s a lot easier to find a roommate that time of year but she can’t wait 10 extra weeks for a cat. Because God knows, cats are hard to come by.
And to top it all off, the guy I have been dating and totally falling for during the last six months just told me that he is moving to Kansas City. In a month. I haven’t liked a guy this much in literally years. And after a minor freak out on my part right at the beginning, which I blame on the fact that I haven’t been so into someone for so damn long and it sort of scared the crap out of me, things have been going about as close to perfect as I’ve ever gotten in a relationship. Ever. But he got a really great job offer in fucking Missouri and apparently it’s too good to pass up.
I must have been a huge asshole in my past life.
Saturday, July 30, 2011
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
I went with a bunch of friends to Hoonah last weekend. They have the longest zip line in North America - over a mile long. I don't really get scared at things like zip lines. I've been sky diving before and that definitely was more nerve-wracking. But just because you aren't afraid to do something doesn't make it any less fun.
Friday, June 10, 2011
Friday, June 03, 2011
Thursday, June 02, 2011
Thursday, May 26, 2011
I never really thought about it, but Hollywood doesn’t exaggerate when it comes to commercial airline pilots. I don’t know if it’s the uniform or the fact that you know and they know they are leaving so there is no accountability. But they definitely live up to their reputation. And no matter how much a pilot may look like Anderson Cooper, he’s not going to take your mind off the boy you are really thinking about. Lesson learned.
My summer job is a joke. I give tours of the capitol building. Nobody comes up to Alaska to tour the capitol. They come up for whale watching cruises or dog mushing rides. But my job pays way better than those other touristy jobs and I know I won’t have to work much. I don’t feel like busting my ass since it could be my last summer in Juneau.
And, God do I hope it’s my last summer doing this shit. Meaning, I really, really want a job that requires at least one ounce of actual thinking each day. What do I have to do to get a real job?! I got another 2 rejection letters today. One actually said, “Priority was given to a person who was born and raised” in Alaska. At least they were honest about it for once. I am so sick of trying to break into this stupid ‘Alaska Club’. Excuse me for not being born here but I can’t believe you are hiring a 23-year old with no experience over me just because I wasn’t born in Fairbanks.
Part of my problem is I have started being picky. I have turned down three jobs so far this year. I just want to like my next ‘real’ job. Is that really such an unrealistic goal? All of the jobs I turned down would have been cubicle hell and I would have been looking for something else within a year. I thought the economy was supposed to be improving. It sucks being so close over and over again.
And finally, WebMD is not a good website to go to when you can’t sleep. In fact, I think there should be a way to ban it from my computer. I am going to die from about 27 different obscure and awful diseases within the next year. Fuck.
Monday, May 16, 2011
Session ending also means my new gentleman friend left this morning. I keep trying to tell myself that at least the session was extended this year and I got to spend three extra weeks with him. I also keep telling myself that I am continuing to plug away at jobs in this field so the odds are our paths will eventually cross again. That doesn’t change the fact though, that I have to sleep alone now. It is amazing how fast you can get used to sharing a bed with someone. I went into it knowing it was only going to be a short term thing but that doesn’t mean I can’t be sad about it. At least for a few days. I’m giving myself a carton of Tillamook Mint Chocolate Chip and People's Will & Kate wedding special to wallow and then I’m moving on. It doesn’t help that I have a mind-numbingly boring summer job that doesn’t start until Thursday and very little else going on to keep my mind off of being lonely. At least it is summer in Juneau which means that while I may be bored, I can still take hikes after work or fish or go out on a boat. There are worse things.
Thursday, May 05, 2011
1. Sheets. I mean, I have a fitted sheet on my bed obviously but I hate the feeling of tucked in sheets. I like getting into a messy bed with a big fluffy comforter and burrowing into it.
2. Not being able to give 1/2 stars on Netflix. I don’t know why this bugs me so much, but really, how much is that to ask?!
3. Olives. Every.single.kind.
4. Dogs that jump on you. I don’t care what breed, 20 pounds or 200 pounds that shit is not cool.
5. Elizabeth Moss. She’s on Mad Men and I know some people think she is pretty but I don’t really see it. I want to like her because I absolutely loved West Wing, but I find her kind of annoying.
Things I Heart:
1. Forehead kisses. And just making out in general really. I’ve been seeing someone and I absolutely love the beginning of a relationship when you just make out for hours and can’t stop thinking about that person. When none of their annoying habits annoy you yet and you fall asleep tangled up together and haven’t moved when you wake up. Unfortunately, this guy is moving soon and I have no idea what is going to happen. But for now, I will take the kisses and not worry about the rest.
2. Friday Night Lights. I just finished watching the last season and am bummed out. I was hoping Mad Men would replace it, but it’s just not the same. (See #4 above)
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Thursday, March 10, 2011
Sunday, March 06, 2011
I live right near a glacier. Glaciers are beautiful. The ice caves around the glacier are spectacular. Nothing beats enjoying a Vitamin R while soaking up some Vitamin D.
Since I decided not to clean, I figured I could take some time to hike out to one of my favorite cabins. What can I say? The sun makes me happy.
It's staying light out until after 6 p.m. now. Spring is in the air regardless of how much snow is on the ground. This is my favorite time of year in Juneau. I may not know what I am doing once my job ends yet, but it's hard to dwell on the scary stuff when you are outside enjoying nature!
Friday, February 25, 2011
I’m working with a bunch of young people right out of college. They all grew up in Alaska. One of the biggest differences between kids that grew up in Alaska and the rest of us? When I was living off ramen, I’d fancy it up by adding some mushrooms or onion. Or sometimes when I was getting really crazy, an egg. Today I discovered that kids up here add king salmon or crab to their ramen. It makes sense, but damn.
Friday, February 18, 2011
Thursday, February 10, 2011
Saturday, February 05, 2011
Friday, February 04, 2011
Sunday, January 23, 2011
Sunday, January 16, 2011
Friday, January 14, 2011