Rambling Jumbled Thoughts

I never really thought about it, but Hollywood doesn’t exaggerate when it comes to commercial airline pilots. I don’t know if it’s the uniform or the fact that you know and they know they are leaving so there is no accountability. But they definitely live up to their reputation. And no matter how much a pilot may look like Anderson Cooper, he’s not going to take your mind off the boy you are really thinking about. Lesson learned.

My summer job is a joke. I give tours of the capitol building. Nobody comes up to Alaska to tour the capitol. They come up for whale watching cruises or dog mushing rides. But my job pays way better than those other touristy jobs and I know I won’t have to work much. I don’t feel like busting my ass since it could be my last summer in Juneau.

And, God do I hope it’s my last summer doing this shit. Meaning, I really, really want a job that requires at least one ounce of actual thinking each day. What do I have to do to get a real job?! I got another 2 rejection letters today. One actually said, “Priority was given to a person who was born and raised” in Alaska. At least they were honest about it for once. I am so sick of trying to break into this stupid ‘Alaska Club’. Excuse me for not being born here but I can’t believe you are hiring a 23-year old with no experience over me just because I wasn’t born in Fairbanks.

Part of my problem is I have started being picky. I have turned down three jobs so far this year. I just want to like my next ‘real’ job. Is that really such an unrealistic goal? All of the jobs I turned down would have been cubicle hell and I would have been looking for something else within a year. I thought the economy was supposed to be improving. It sucks being so close over and over again.

And finally, WebMD is not a good website to go to when you can’t sleep. In fact, I think there should be a way to ban it from my computer. I am going to die from about 27 different obscure and awful diseases within the next year. Fuck.

Ice Cream & People Magazine

My summer is going to be pretty dull. Especially after the last few months. Juneau is a land locked capital, which means now that the legislative session is over all my new wonk friends are scattering throughout the state and I have no idea when I will see them again. Probably not until next session and that doesn’t start until January. And that is assuming I can manage to get a job in the capitol building, which is most definitely not a guarantee. As everyone floods out of Juneau, I am lamenting the loss of my much improved social life. I might be just about the only person that worked in the building that is not looking forward to the interim.

Session ending also means my new gentleman friend left this morning. I keep trying to tell myself that at least the session was extended this year and I got to spend three extra weeks with him. I also keep telling myself that I am continuing to plug away at jobs in this field so the odds are our paths will eventually cross again. That doesn’t change the fact though, that I have to sleep alone now. It is amazing how fast you can get used to sharing a bed with someone. I went into it knowing it was only going to be a short term thing but that doesn’t mean I can’t be sad about it. At least for a few days. I’m giving myself a carton of Tillamook Mint Chocolate Chip and People's Will & Kate wedding special to wallow and then I’m moving on. It doesn’t help that I have a mind-numbingly boring summer job that doesn’t start until Thursday and very little else going on to keep my mind off of being lonely. At least it is summer in Juneau which means that while I may be bored, I can still take hikes after work or fish or go out on a boat. There are worse things.

Love and Hate

Things that really bug me:
1. Sheets. I mean, I have a fitted sheet on my bed obviously but I hate the feeling of tucked in sheets. I like getting into a messy bed with a big fluffy comforter and burrowing into it.
2. Not being able to give 1/2 stars on Netflix. I don’t know why this bugs me so much, but really, how much is that to ask?!
3. Olives. Every.single.kind.
4. Dogs that jump on you. I don’t care what breed, 20 pounds or 200 pounds that shit is not cool.
5. Elizabeth Moss. She’s on Mad Men and I know some people think she is pretty but I don’t really see it. I want to like her because I absolutely loved West Wing, but I find her kind of annoying.

Things I Heart:
1. Forehead kisses. And just making out in general really. I’ve been seeing someone and I absolutely love the beginning of a relationship when you just make out for hours and can’t stop thinking about that person. When none of their annoying habits annoy you yet and you fall asleep tangled up together and haven’t moved when you wake up. Unfortunately, this guy is moving soon and I have no idea what is going to happen. But for now, I will take the kisses and not worry about the rest.
2. Friday Night Lights. I just finished watching the last season and am bummed out. I was hoping Mad Men would replace it, but it’s just not the same. (See #4 above)
3. Chai.