It can’t possibly get any bigger than it is right now. I can tell that it is tormenting me and enjoying it. I’m also convinced that it is trying to breed. Could stress have caused this monstrosity? I find that hard to believe considering I found time to watch seven episodes of The Office at work yesterday. That’s right, seven. I take solace in the fact that I don’t have any yearbook pictures coming up, but I do have a meeting later today and it’s hard to feel professional with a growth on your face. Thank God I don’t have a goiter; I’d never get anything done.